Two games. The New York Rangers were only two games away from competing for a Stanley Cup. It seems like yesterday, doesn’t it? Looking at tickets, deciding how to tell the significant other that the $3,000 deposit was not just for a Stanley Cup final game but also for a memory. Playing shortstop in slow pitch softball with an airpod in listening to the game because you convinced yourself that if you’re not listening then they will lose and it will be all your fault. Know your role, am I right? Unfortunately, the boys in blue couldn’t get it done and they were sent home too early by an in your face Florida Panthers team who eventually went on to win the cup.
Special teams – the ones that win when it matters – have a strong identity. Look at teams like Florida, Tampa Bay, Dallas, and Edmonton: every player buys into their team’s identity. Florida is tough and relentless. Tampa’s forecheck is merciless, with straight-line speed that suffocates opponents. Dallas plays a bruising, north-south game. Edmonton feeds McDavid and Draisaitl, letting their stars shine. And Colorado? Well, they let MacKinnon and Makar run wild.
So, what’s the Rangers’ identity? Honestly, what is it? When I say “The New York Rangers,” what do you think of?
This brings me to the biggest problem that the Rangers have both on the ice and financially – The Wonder Twins.
This picture makes me want to vomit.
How many times has Chris Kreider looked like he was going to cry in an interview only to go dog it for 18 minutes and say again, it just wasn’t good enough. Night in and night out, we have watched one of the most physically gifted players in the league be okay with other players taking his puck away from him. This is a huge problem when you’re supposed to be one of the team’s leaders. Young players like Lafrenière, Chytil, Berard, and Edström are watching this, and if they see Kreider, a supposed leader, not competing, what does that tell them? Wouldn’t you want your young players to look up to someone who goes all-in every time the puck hits the corner? Someone who refuses to let the opposition win a 50/50 battle? How many times have you seen 20 skate 100 miles per hour at a player only to pull up at the last second? Put the mother fucker through the boards – inflict pain. How is pulling up on a hit hard to play against? Chris Kreider can be one of the most physically dominating players in the league but he’s decided to just carve out a career standing in front of the net tipping pucks. He is very good at this but is that going to bring a Stanley Cup to NY? No, no it won’t.
One of the biggest miracles in the world is that Mika Zibanejad is an NHL hockey player. How many NHLers are there in the world? 20 players – 32 teams – roughly 640 players. 640 of the best players in the world playing in the same league and somehow world renowned charmin soft Mika Zibanejad was able to sneak his way into this group. He is 6’2 202lbs of marshmallow peeps, dubstep and butterfly kisses. Time and time again, scrum after scrum, Mika Zibanejad shies away from any sort of physical threat which is insane for a *checks notes* hockey player. Aren’t hockey players supposed to be tough? Aren’t hockey players supposed to play for each other? I just don’t understand how he isn’t embarrassed to the point where he even leaves his house. He isn’t living up to his contract, he’s being out played by every opposing player night in and night out and he hasn’t done ONE THING TO CHANGE IT. Players go through slumps – ups and downs, peaks and valleys. Sure, the puck isn’t going in but maybe – just maybe – you can go out and check. Maybe – just maybe – you can defend. Maybe – just maybe – you can be hard to play against. Okay, that last one was a joke, we all know that will never happen. In life there is something called fight or flight and Mika Zibanejad piddles himself any time anyone raises their voice or looks at him weird. He is soft, he is defeated, he is quite literally the opposite of anything I would look for in a player. No motor, no edge. As someone who loves hockey more than life itself, It is absolutely infuriating that this soy boy beta cuck gets to play in the NHL.
The character of these two players in question hasn’t happened overnight. Chris Kreider has always been a player who could’ve been an absolute beast but refuses to do anything about it. Mika Zibanejad normally puts the puck in the net but has always been this way. He has played 882 NHL hockey games and has not been in one fight. Not one single time has this guy ever dropped the mits. Does he have to? Absolutely not, I’m not a moron. I know he’s a skill guy and that’s not his cup of tea – but how have you played almost 1,000 hockey games and not once gotten to a point where you wanted to punch someone in the face – or come screaming into a pile to help a teammate. Panarin has been in one – look it up.
You will not win a Stanley Cup when the Wonder boys lead you to war – that’s a Mark Messier guarantee.
Defensively – the Rangers are in shambles. Adam Fox is so tired. Once a Norris trophy winner, Fox has not been playing up to his expectations. It wasn’t long ago that 23 would literally dominate hockey games. So what has changed? Well, the answer isn’t something I’d ever want to say but Ryan Lindgren, bless his heart, is absolutely shot. The wear and tear this warrior has been through has finally caught up to him – think Girardi circa 2016-17. I think the running total of the ‘Is Ryan Lindgren Bleeding?’ alarm has to be around 14-15 hundred times? Ryan Lindgren will always be one of my favorite Rangers but it’s time to cut that chord. Fox is having to do everything now without a reliable safe net that he had had for years with 55.
Braden Schneider competes hard and I’m actually excited to see him maybe take another step and really solidify himself as a top 4 defenseman. Newly acquired Will Borgen has an edge to him that other Rangers defenseman lack and seems to be okay in the D zone.
The Rangers HAVE to start making more moves NOW.https://t.co/H2asmmniJU pic.twitter.com/gttQxYCBwc
— Spittin’ Chiclets (@spittinchiclets) December 23, 2024
Avery went on Chiclets and nailed it with K’Andre Miller. Sell and sell now. Does he have the tools? Absolutely. Will he ever put it together? Much like Mika Zibanejad – Miller does not like conflict and when you’re trying to compete for a cup you need guys who play 20 minutes a night who are looking forward to making the other teams forwards have a really bad day. Miller does not do this nor does it look like he ever will.
There are a few bright spots in NY. I know that seems impossible but players like Will Cuylle, Alexis Lafreniere, Brett Berard, and Vinny Trocheck will be around for a while. All 4 of these players have that dog in them. When they get punched in the face, they fight back. I mean, really the main point is that the Rangers need more players like this and less players like the Wonder Twins. Can you imagine having this start to the year and being healthy scratched as a 13 year veteran with a letter on your jersey?
Where to go from here: Will the Rangers make the playoffs? Probably and unfortunately not. Drury has to do some shuffling here. Once he knows what moves he potentially can make, I think it’d be time to get rid of Laviolette and start a regime with someone new. The NYC Libs would lose their shit over Joel Quenneville but he has coached Panarin and he has won Stanley Cups – I think that guy might know how to win. Who knows, maybe?
The only way the Rangers will get back into this is if they look at themselves in the mirror and decide to do something about it. To decide to go out there every shift and do something productive. To go out every shift and be a bad mamajama – someone who is hard to play against. The bad news for the Rangers is that Kreider will be watching Mika and Mika will be too busy doing his hair.
